Oct 19, 2016

8 Reasons to Stop Waiting for Him to Make the First Move

So you have met a great guy at work and there is definitely some chemical explosion between the two of you, but he has not yet made a move and you are stuck sitting in the corner of the street not knowing if you should walk away and risk losing something that could possibly be great or to take a risk and move on ahead, taking the lead in the situation.

1. We are no longer finding ourselves in the 19th century

Let me start off by reminding you that we are no longer finding ourselves in the 19th century where women had to wait for their Mr. Darcy to come knock on the door, sweep them off their feet and take them out for a nice romantic stroll before he proposes to them.

We are in the 21st century where women have a say and instead of resorting to the obsessive social media stalking of the guy in order to get to know him. I say, “Stop mellowing in passivity and profusely drowning in the pressure of waiting for the guy to make the first move and just go and ask him out.”

2. Women that ask men out are no longer seen as desperate and immoral ladies of the night

Yes, ladies, it is the 21st century and women that ask men out are no longer seen as desperate and immoral ladies of the night, they are now seen as strong and sufficient ladies who know what they want and are not afraid to go after it and claim it – come hell or high water.

It perplexes me greatly that the norm for ladies is still to somehow hold an air of mystery and sophistication around them. They honestly believe that by playing hard to get they will encourage the guy that they are interested in to want them even more and who can blame them.

For centuries we have been manipulated to resort to passivity or even indirect strategies in order to get the guy. Yet, in a society that is constantly evolving and moving forward, this seems to be petty and inconsequential. Come on girls, own what your mama gave you and go for the guy!

Read also – 12 Worst Flirting Mistakes Women Make

3. He was never meant for you

If he is too intimidated by your approach, he was never meant for you and you can hold the door with a confident and friendly smile as he walks out to “catch” a girl who is willing to sit around and wait for things to fall into place. Oh, and exactly the way he wants it of course. Thank him as you now patiently wait for the man who will love your wild heart for chasing him and who will not call on you to be tamed.

4. Technology is also coming up to speed

Bumble is an online dating app with a slogan that reads, “Changing the rules of the game.” It was the owner, Whitney Wolfe’s, aim to turn the tables and pass the ball directly in the ladies court (pun might have been intended). The power now lies with her – about time too, and the men dig it.

5. Women who initiate the first move feel more in control of their lives

Once you make that first move you can definitely count on gaining his respect and at the very least you have established your position as a woman who can hold her own. This theory has in fact been proven by the researchers, MacGregor and Cavallo, who came to the conclusion that those women who initiated the first move felt more in control of their lives, which in turn reflected in their relationship.

6. A woman who approaches a man stands out

Sean Connelay from Elite Daily states that a man never minds it when a girl approaches him and asks him out (an ego thing if you ask me). He goes on to say that a woman who approaches a man stands out and he can immediately see that not only is she bold, but she seems real.

The best thing about a girl approaching a guy is that the politics and over-thinking involved in Venus is not something active in Mars. Sean claims that he has not yet met a man that has complained about a girl approaching him or a man that has ever made her feel bad about it. If he is not interested, he will let her down easy.

7. Flirt is still a thing

If you still find your courage failing and would like a little more confirmation from his side, flirt a little more. Be aware of his body language when he is around you, notice how he talks to you and how he talks about you.

If his eyes glisten and his smile is so wide and bright it would make the actors in a Colgate commercial green with envy, yet he still has not mustered up the courage to ask you out (yes, they also fear rejection and embarrassment) then it is time to pull up your socks, take a deep breath in and make that untamed move.

Read also – 10 Strange, Funny and Effective Pickup Lines

8. Stop ruining your mental health by obsessing over a man

If he says that you are too much, then all you have to do is remind yourself of Nikita Gill’s words: “Baby, here is the real problem. He is too little to appreciate that it took an entire galaxy being woven into one soul to make you.”

We honestly have to stop wasting our time and ruining our mental health by obsessing over a man that might or might not be interested in the magic and adventure we have to offer.

We have to stop being afraid of whether or not we will look like fools in front of him or anyone else for that matter. That anxiety is unnecessary and frankly, it is minuscule compared to all the hurt, betrayal, and rejection that is currently unfolding in the world.

There is a powerful fire inside you that is waiting to be tapped in and expressed – do not let it be diminished and eventually extinguished by centuries’ old mind sets and fear of rejection. Rise up and claim your position and voice. Life is too short not to remind yourself of the goddess that you are.

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