Aug 20, 2016

8 Things Your Childfree Friends Are Thinking About Your Kids

Have you crossed over into the land of parenthood full of diapers, bottles, and baby laughs? If so, you know how all-encompassing it can be and that soon enough it is the only thing you talk about with friends and family.

But what about your friends that are non-parents? If you think they are as excited to talk about your kids for hours on end, you may be delusional. Here are ten things your non-parent friends are really thinking.

1. You have changed… like a lot

Sure, you are still you and they still love you, but you are also a completely different person at the same time and it is going to take them some getting used to. The friend they have known did not talk for hours and hours about the smallest thing they saw their baby do last night.

And, they probably used to shower more often and wear makeup and pants and bras with underwire. It is totally cool though and we totally get it, but it is like getting to know a new person, so show them grace.

2. We just do not get it

You love your children like nothing else on earth. You would literally walk into traffic at rush hour for them. But your non-parent friends have not experienced that kind of love before so they probably do not understand it yet.

Remember how you used to think you could maybe possibly imagine what it would be like to be a mom? Is it anything close to how you feel now? We did not think so. So no, they really do not get it when you say you miss your child while they are just in the next room. And that’s okay.

3. We miss hanging out without the baby

Do not get me wrong, your friends probably do love your children and want to spend time with them, but they also probably miss kicking it old school and throwing back a shot or two like you are young again.

Keep this in mind and do not automatically assume that every invite includes your whole clan. That invitation to watch The Bachelor and drink wine is probably just for mama so call a babysitter and bring an extra bottle of Chardonnay.

Read also – 7 Perks of Having a Baby in Your 20s

4. We have meaningful lives too

How many times have you told your non-parent friend that you did not know the meaning of life until you held your child? Hey, I get it because I have been there! But I have also been the older non-parent in the group of friends and you know what? My life had meaning then, too. It just did not have the same meaning that it does now.

Try to remember what it was like before that sweet baby showed up and do not make someone feel worthless just because they are not a parent. In fact, try to encourage your friends and show them how much value they bring to this world just by being themselves.

Oh, and do not assume that just because they do not have kids means they are available to babysit on the weekends. Remember, they have lives too!

5. Yes, they are loud and yes, it is annoying

When your child is screaming at the top of their lungs and throwing food across the restaurant, keep in mind that while this may be just another Friday night for you, it’s not normal for your childfree friends.

If you can’t calm your angel down, take them for a quick walk or see if you can distract them with a toy. Bottom line is, do not pretend like it is not happening because it definitely, definitely is.

6. No, I don’t want to see another photo

If you are like me, your phone storage is being stretched to its limits by hundreds of photos of your baby doing the same exact thing but from a slightly different angle or in better lighting. But unfortunately, not everyone wants or needs to see every moment that you capture on your iPhone.

Sad, but true. Share the highlights but keep the masses for the scrapbook. This rule goes for social media, too. Spare your friends the hourly picture updates. They will be much more likely to coo over Junior if they are not seeing his face every single time that they are checking their newsfeed.

7. I think I will stick to my fur babies

Remember how much you used to love your dog before your kids came along? Well, they still feel that way about them and they probably wonder how they could ever feel different. So, keep that in mind and show their fur babies some love because chances are, they are thinking they are a lot less to handle than your baby.

When was the last time you filled up your baby’s food bowl and left them at the house while you went shopping for the day? See what I mean? Fur babies have their perks, for sure.

Read also – I Love Kids But I Choose to Be Childfree

8. I’m a little jealous of your life

Sure, they love their freedom and they wonder how you make it through the day with kids that are so dependent on you for every little thing. But you know what? Some of them would probably trade that freedom for what you have in a heartbeat.

So before you complain to them about your sleepless nights or spit-up spattered blouse, remember that they may be wishing those were their problems. Not everyone gets to have children, so things you are stressing about just may be the very things they are jealous about. Stay mindful and watch what you are saying around them.

Living kid-free probably feels like it was another life for you, and technically it was. But it is the life that your childfree friends are still living today, so make sure that you are not bombarding them with your baby-bliss to the point where they start screening their calls.

I am positive that they think your kids are the cutest things to walk planet earth, too. But that does not mean the earth revolves around them, pal.

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